


What to Expect (?) When You're (???) Expecting (?????????)

by Echinoderma



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Implied Mpreg, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-26
Updated: 2013-07-26
Packaged: 2017-12-21 09:45:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/898830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Echinoderma/pseuds/Echinoderma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Mail, Cecil!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	What to Expect (?) When You're (???) Expecting (?????????)

**Author's Note:**

> just read it

"Mail, Cecil!"

1.

The first letter was innocent enough. Plain white, sealed evenly, containing what felt like only the thinnest sheet of paper.  Cecil handled it gingerly, noting the return address written in neat script in ordinary, black ink.

Fishing for his letter opener, he slit the perfectly closed backing to reveal a impeccably creased piece of parchment, the same orderly handwriting revealing a short, sweet, and most innocuous message.

_Hello, Dearest Cecil,_

_So nice to speak to you again! I know you're very busy in Night Vale, so I'll keep this short. Something wonderful has happened to me, and I couldn't think of anyone who I'd rather tell than you, my dear counterpart._

_I'm pregnant!_

_I'll be sure to send you regular updates, a growing child is a thing best shared, wouldn't you say?_

_Cheers,_

_Kevin_

Cecil stared at the letter for a long time before reaching for a lighter and setting it aflame.

 

2.

The second came a month later with more of the same. White, even, and addressed in perfect, tidy script.

_Hello, Lovely Cecil,_

_I've got the faintest hint of a bulge growing, oh how I wish you were here to feel it! The doctor recommended I up my daily calcium intake, I am taking nutrients for two, you know. But where to get all those bones? I'll have to head to the local hatchery, I guess. Pregnancy sure is a trial!_

_Sincerely,_

_Kevin_

Another for the fire, then.

3.

The third came stained, a pale orange fluid blotching the fine china white of the envelope. Cecil made sure to avoid contact with the blemish entirely, grasping it along the edge at all times. The letter inside also carried stains, strands of orangish fluid thinning as Cecil pulled the folded parchment apart.

_Hello, Darling Cecil,_

_I felt the fist kick! Such an exhilarating moment for a young father like myself. Oh, if I could transmit the feeling to you in some way that wouldn't cause you excruciating agony I would, perhaps with only mild or fleeting agony instead. I'm afraid the suckers have just began to form on my palms, I tried to keep the oozing off the letter as best as I could, but as you may notice, some of it has escaped me._

_He'll be such a bundle of joy, I just know it!_

_Tenderly,_

_Kevin_

He wasn't sure about the orange fluid being burned; Cecil decided the shredder was a much safer option in this case.

4.

Another month brought the fourth, which showed signs of wear; thin, inch long scores along the length of the envelope, one corner darkened with thick, viscous orange. He almost dared to leave it unopened, but curiosity and a little bit of fear held him to it. The letter opener squelched as it slit the moist corner, parts of the folded parchment inside almost translucent with moisture. Luckily, the writing (now somewhat unrefined) remained undisturbed.

_Hello, Wise Cecil,_

_The sixth digit makes writing somewhat difficult, I hope you don't mind the slight drop in quality of my script. Sacrifices must be made for a child after all, both personal and living._

_But joy of joys, the chitin is growing in without a problem! The doctor was afraid of a premature exoskeleton, but the early start seems to have had no major effect on the baby. Let me tell you, splitting skin itches like you won't believe! I am truly excited, of course. Every parent dreams of a nice, fresh molt to give to their newborn, I'm certain it will turn out wonderfully! I can already see the dappling on my ribs!_

_There is a persistent pressure to the sides of my chest, I do wonder if those are the second set of limbs trying to poke through. I guess we'll find out soon!_

_Joyfully,_

_Kevin._

Cecil felt a slight migraine marching in. Time to let the intern handle this.

5.

Letter number five was no letter at all, but a package. Though tightly wrapped, Cecil could see the item expand and deflate slightly. Breathing, perhaps. He moved to open the wrapped parcel, against his (usually impeccable) judgment, the box going still as he tore the thin, brown paper away. Hidden just under the wrapping was a small, dampened card.

_Hello, Clever Cecil_

_Pictures couldn't do it justice, I just had to send it to you! Don't worry about shipping, I have it all covered. Enjoy!_

_Lovingly,_

_Kevin._

He needn't have cut the layers of tape holding it together, the package was perfectly capable of that on its own.

5.5

He woke up to the barest sliver of sun in a daze, tickled into consciousness by the long curling strands of his Carlos' perfect locks.

"You didn't show up at Rito's, Cecil." Carlos murmured, concern clear in his tightly drawn brows. "I was worried."

Cecil glanced at the top of his desk; clear and clean as if it had been untouched for days.

6.

 He didn't read that one. Yet, somehow, he still knew what it said.

7.

The envelope was thick, flexible leather, sewn with strong white sinew in a perfect blanket stitch around the edges. It was inescapable, the sense of knowing, so Cecil cut the wound cord and extracted the letter from the fleshy interior.

_hello, persistent Cecil_

_the time is almost nigh for my daughter to be born- i can see her forming through the abdomen window! im so glad it grew in before the thorax. i would love for you to witness her birth in person, yet alas, im afraid the doctor clearly stated no visitors during the procedure. she's wonderful cecil, just wonderful. full of life and ash and blood, i think she even has your eyes!_

_my molting has been going smoother than i ever could have expected, a nice tart crunch to the main segments, with a nice salt taste to the extremities. perfect for her, i know. i wanted to get this letter out before i  finished my mucous cocoon; keeping you updated is my priority after all!._

_p.s. plaid paternity wear: in or out? i don't want to embarrass her before she's even out of the womb after all!_

_Delightfully,_

_Kevin_

Something writhed in the corner of his eye; haunting, squirming blackness. Cecil felt bile swirl in his throat and knives dance in his stomach every time he spotted it.

8.

No letter came; bringing a curious sense of absence to Cecil's heart.

The writhing continued throughout the month, however. They replaced a lot of interns.

9.

The letter was, oddly enough, exactly like the first, right down to the slight leftward slant of the _L_ in Cecil's name.

He barely had time to comprehend the words before something tackled him to the ground.

_Dear Cecil,_

_She's beautiful._

 

_Kevin._

 


End file.
